Exclusive First Ever Interview! Crime and Punishment 2011

Here is an exclusive interview with Crime and Punishment 2011. They’re a new act from Birmingham and this is the exclusive first ever interview with them. We were a bit drunk while recording this, but it was hilarious. I would like to apologise to Sleaford Mods, Peace, Enter Shikari, and Morrissey. On behalf of me, Jason and Dan.

***

All right, B-Town Blog coming atcha! With Crime and (Laughs), Grime and fashion! Punishment 2011.  I’m with Jason Pink Violence Cassius Neon Tyler, and errr, Dan Carter. D.A.N Carter?  Were you the Bantorious D.A.N guy?

Dan: I don’t know who that is! I don’t know who that is!

I saw a face that looks a bit like yours on a gig poster.

Dan:  I genuinely have no idea what you are talking about.

Jason: Have you got a tattoo of shit on your arm?

Dan: Yeah, you should remember you did it.

You do tattoos now Jason?

Jason: Apparently so!

How would you describe your music to someone who’s never heard it?

Dan: This isn't three words, but have you ever seen the movie John Wick? That film made me so angry it made me want to start writing music. I think the best way to describe Crime and Punishment's music is. In the name. How did our vocalist, Glitch describe it?

Your vocalist is called Glitch?

Dan: We have three vocalists. Myself, there’s glitch, and there’s Joe Jones/Joey Sniper.

Joey Sniper? Have you checked Enter Shikari are ok with that?

Dan: Yeah, I think Enter Shikari are in the most overrated band on the planet

Jason: I quite like Enter Shikari!

Dan: Yeah that’s what everyone thinks. I don’t have anything against them. Rou! I’m sorry you’re a nice guy! Crime and punishment’s music is... Imagine if Limp Bizkit came from Birmingham and got dumped even more times. Grime and punishment is my brain child.

Where does the 2011 bit come from?

Dan: That is the year that I was born.

So was that like a great year for music?

Dan: It was the year that we, the original members, 6 of them are now gone sadly, decided to make this a reality and that’s just where it came from. Studio recording with Hellbound. I was just doing some vocals on a track and just ended up saying the year and it all just went from there.

So are you like Sleaford Mods? One of those happy accidents?

Dan: Oh no, nothing about this is an accident. Sleaford Mods are cool man. They’ve got a song on the Prodigy’s new album and its fucking sick (Jason Cringes). They’re like the musical equivalent of special brew.

Jason: I’ve got no time for Sleaford Mods.

Sleaford Mods have got beef with Slaves, does that annoy you?

Dan: Slaves are one of the greatest bands of our generation.

I saw them in a pub garden last year and they were just fucking amazing. I really envy their singer/drummer cos he’s the most amazing abs. Every time I look at him I’m just like DAMN that guys in shape! Even though I’m taller.

Dan: I think people should judge people by their minds rather than their bodies.

So you’re inspired by grime, who are your favourite grime stars? Who are your favourite rappers? Who are your favourite Grime stars?

Dan: First grime album I ever listened to was money over everyone by P Money. I was 17 I'd made the weird transition from bands like Carcass, to NAS, via that song Eminem did with Aerosmith. 3 things I wanna say on record, I'm not a goat. Blacklisted by Skepta is one of the greatest bodies of music of all time and Morrissey is a dick. He's not even Vegan!

Have you read his new book?

Dan: I have, I read an extract and it made me want to eat my own poo. It's a biopic about sex.

Jason (Shocked): Morrissey has wrote a biopic about sex!

It’s about a group of runners that get kidnapped by Satan. I don’t know where the sex comes into it but that’s kind of what it’s about.  They’re a group of long distance, well short distance runners, that make a deal with the devil or something

Dan: I really don’t care about anything Morrissey does, I think my dad said it the best when he said if there’s anyone he could wish cancer on its Morrissey. That’s my dad’s words not mine for the record

There’s a lot of talk at the moment of a grime revival you got people like Bugzy Malone, you got people like Stormzy and other people like that. Do you think there’s a big grime revival to be a part of or is it just the media stirring shit up?

Dan: This is one thing that really bugs me, The US is getting all hyped up on Skepta. 4 years ago he did a song with Diddy it was the very first Grime/ US rap collaboration. He released a video for his song 'all over the house' which was basically just a soft-core porn video.

It was hardcore.

Dan: It was very hardcore. Then again we do watch some fucked up porn before band practice. Grime never went away. Yet this is definitely the most vibrant it’s ever been.

So just to reiterate, there used to be 8 of your guys and now there’s like 4?

Dan: Yeah  we’ve been going for 4 years started with just two, at one point there were 12 then it went down to three, and now there’s 4.

 Lucky number 4?

(A shouting match ensues between Jason and Dan)

Jason: See what I have to put up with?  You’re worse than asparagus you are!

Dan: We got an EP dropping called Extra Hour, at the end of the month.  It’s got 4 songs on it. All original.

Are you putting out on vinyl?

Dan: I don’t know what that that is. 

Jason: We are actually releasing it on cassette tape.

Dan: We will release it on blank CD’s and I’m going to go round the neighbourhood shoving in people’s faces.

Does that mean they’ll be no music on it?

Dan: No there will be music on it but it won’t be ours. I’m gonna put my freaky love mix on it.

You’re probably going to get signed because of that. 

Dan: We just wanna play bare shows.

You’re playing naked?

Dan: No were playing with actual bears. I play with a gun in my boxers, Jason plays with a boxer in his guns.

Is that a gun in your boxers or are you just excited to see me?

Dan:  No it’s a gun in my boxers.

Me: So you’re not excited to see me?

Dan: I’m just here to answer questions.  

What did the D.A.N stand for?

Dan: My names Dan. It actually stands for dirty and needy, which are 3 words I’d use to describe myself. I feel that life is an adventure, and I’ve taken far too much cocaine.

There’s probably some behind the sofa, left over from when peace played here 5 years ago.  I can play guitar, can I join?

Dan:  There is a heavy waiting list. We’re hoping to get a tour next year, were going to just plug ourselves in to PA’s and ram it down people’s throats.  Yeah but on a serious note, next year were taking over. And if we could support 3 bands it would be Blue, Tyler the Creator, Breaking Benjamin, and that band you showed me the other day. What are they called? Daft Punk! Their sick!
Jason: No fuck that I’ve never heard of them, Who the fuck are daft punk?

Some French geezers?

Enter JJ PLUTO (Alex Moir), and Dan Screams at him about how much he loved his second album, (he’s not made one yet). What you have read is the mere highlights of a half hour conversation. 

Check their music here https://crimepunishment2011.bandcamp.com/

An open letter to NME

Hello NME, It's been a while since we've talked, The conversations have always been a little bit one sided,  but I think we need to have a bit of a discussion.
I've been reading your magazine now for about 5 years. The first ever copy I bought had Liam Fray on the cover. It feels silly to have such a strong relationship with a little indie rag. Especially one that many hipsters and people in bands despise. I've always disliked NME for slagging off the bands I like, but loved it for slagging the ones I don't. I hate to admit it but at least 70% of all the music I've listened to over the last few years has been because I read about it in your magazine. It's fair to say, I'm a tad obsessive. I won't give you all the credit for making me want to be a music writer myself. As someone who constantly over analyses everything, being a journalist has always kind of appealed to me. But it was those first few reports on 'B-town' that made me want to go out and bury myself in the scene. The need to do this and shout about the great bands you'd forgotten to mention. Broken Witt Rebels, Soldier, Pink Violence, Duke.. was what inspired the blog.
I imagine your editor writes all the positive messages about NME's new direction through gritted teeth. The on-line crowd of (lets face it, not very open minded) readers, which have been split between those who were tired of seeing Noel on the cover, and those (like me) who bought the rag to see new bands, featured and on the cover. This bunch have been angrily writing about NME's downfall for years, but in my mind 2013 was NME's golden year, it was a great year for music. Those issues celebrated the birth of new scenes with infectious excitement and in-depth knowledge. It's strange to think of how great the magazine still was only 6 months ago. To see the NME go from that to this is downright depressing. The new issues are in no way bad. The writing is more or less the same. But your target audience seems to be 18-25 year old's with ADD and little interest in the variety of new subjects that you cover. Or just anyone who can be bothered to pick it up
I have no problem with articles on film, politics, and style, but as a music obsessive, music needs to be the focus. I'm happy to see Peter Robinson back, that the adverts and features are kept separate. That upcoming artists are given a shout, and that some features have remained. However some things need addressing.

• I really don't like your new columnist, she's the sort of kale eating narcissist that obviously sees feminism as a hashtag rather than the political/social movement that the suffragettes founded. Rather than replacing her, give us a new columnist each week. Anthony Fantano and Joel Friemark would both be perfect. 
• Stop recommending gigs that have sold out, it's very annoying. Bring back live reviews
• More album reviews, more new music features
• Bring back the crossword, and (once the hype wears off) letters page
• Cover stars and non cover stars get equal amounts of space
• Your new app is probably great, make one for windows 

Like I said, the new issues are not bad, but I think you need to remember the wise words of one Ron Swanson "never half ass two things, whole ass one thing". I doubt I'll stop picking up the new issues, there's no real reason not if if their free. I may however start reading Mojo as my main mag instead. I accept that with all new formats and re-branding, there will be teething. But with the last ever monetary issue being a celebration of NME's past, I'd like to see such great features, covers, and stories in the future. Despite not having lost any money, I feel a bit cheated.

Top 5: Albums to play on a sunny day

In no particular order...

• Demon Days : Gorillaz 

Dead planets, ecological disasters, villages being pillaged and worst of all (gulp!) Shaun Ryder. Yet 10 years on Demon days is not only one of the defining albums of the 00's it's also one of the perfect albums to play when the sun comes out. Despite being a decade old, the beats, lush instrumentation, and overall the amazing song-writing still makes it sound incredibly fresh. Damon Albarn collaborates with plenty of guests, including De La Soul and Roots Manuva, and moves effortlessly from Funk to soul, to hip hop, via storytelling and world music influences. If by some strange turn of events, you've not heard this album then our current little indian summer is the perfect time to give it a spin.

• Definitely Maybe : Oasis

Regular readers of this blog will know that I don't really rate Oasis. Or at least know that I'd hate to see them take that much talked about Glastonbury slot from a band that has spent the last 10 years of their absence working their own way up. Say Foals? I like Noel G's solo stuff and love the 'Don't believe the truth' album. But it's the début that people rave about. While throughout most of the year I find this mash up of old Slade riffs and nasal vocals, uninspiring. There is about 5 days during august when the sun shines at it's highest, reserves are low, and the flat 4/4 rhythms suit my biorhythms perfectly. Tonight I'm  a rock n roll star? yeah man, Rock n roll.

• 3 Feet High and Rising : De La Soul

Any thing that came out of Hip-hop's first golden era is essential summer time music. Whether that be the Beasties, NWA, Public Enemy, Etc Etc.. but 3 Feet High and Rising is De La Soul's masterpiece and one of the essential hip-hop records. In truth it doesn't even hold together too well, The skits are stupid and nonsensical, the mix was far too quiet and it's about 5 tracks too long. But the track-listing speaks for itself, Say no go, The magic number, Jenifa Taught me, Me myself and I...  it is packed with absolute jams. They rebelled against the gangsta rap cliches that were to come, and embraced peace,  love and daisies. Yet they were smart and tongue in cheek enough to avoid seeming naff or out of touch.

•  Surf : Donnie Trumpet and the Social Experiment 

There are many changes that  the internet has bought to the world of music, some negative, some positive. Yet Chance The Rapper made us all wait months for Surf to drop, and when it finally did,  I listened to it about twice, then forgot about it. I wanted a perfect summers day to blast it out on, and unfortunately 2015 didn't give me many of those. Which is a shame, as Surf is a fantastic album. Full of talented people, positive vibes and good tunes. 

• Mutations : Beck 

You may have noticed by now that this blog is being written off the top of my head. The albums are more or less the first ones that popped into my head. Of course anything by Beck is essential listening. Morning Phase, and Odelay for example are polar opposites, one is bouncy, fun, and daft. The other beautifully mournful and moves at a glacial pace. Mutations  is neither of these. It is Beck's blues album, perfect for lounging on a sunny day, but even better for drinking a whiskey by yourself to in an empty pub nearing closing time. It's packed with variety, but even the most upbeat tracks hide a heart of darkness. It's the fact that Beck makes all this depression into something that's moving, sad, and in places just ridiculous. Overall it's relaxed, and works best while taking a nap with the sun directly

above you.

...and that's it, you've only got a few weeks of sunshine left, so get listening.